What you and your Partner Should Discuss Before Swinging

Date 18th Dec 2015 | Views  732

Whenever I'm with a friend at a bar, we would always see a range of girls walking by in their skin-tight dresses and their 6-inch heels. I'd nudge him and say:

"She's hot! I wouldn't mind getting close to her!"

My mate would reply:

"If she's as kinky as you, we should invite her back to mine!"

That would be before we see her in the arms of another guy.

"Aw, damn. She's got a man..."

"So? Ask him to come round too!"

I act like this when I'm with my girlfriends too.

We would sometimes see a handsome man walk by our table, where our eyes would lock onto him until he starts kissing his girlfriend. One time my friend went.

"Shit! He's taken!"

"His girlfriend looks sexy too...do you know what I'm thinking of?"

What to think about when it comes to swinging

We all have a fantasy of exchanging partners in the bedrooms. Some people turn that fantasy into a reality by joining the swinger's 'lifestyle', which has enhanced their sex life drastically. However, the lifestyle is not something you can just dive into straight away, especially if you're already in a relationship with another man or woman. If you want to get involved in swinging, you need to make sure that your partner is ok with it.

I'm not talking about a verbal agreement like:

"Babe, would you like to try out swinging?"

"Uh...yeah, ok."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's try it out."

If I were to ask my partner about wife swapping, I'd read his body language to see if he is comfortable with me getting pleasured by another person. Even if he is more than happy to join me in a variety of saucy adventures, the establishment of going into the lifestyle is just one hurdle less from all the others that I have to cross over.

Having a swinging agreement with your partner is always necessary when it comes to fondling with other people. Wife swapping is a three-legged race; you have to work together to reach the finish line. When it comes to your special companion, you need to be open and honest with what you would like to happen when you two get frisky with another couple. Otherwise, what you would be doing is adultery; not swinging. You need to discuss the four important key factors that will make your swinging experience go without a blip.

'Hi there! Would you like to fuck?'

Every couple has a different and unique way of approaching the swinger's lifestyle. There are those who would rather prefer to meet with other couples in confidence, whereas others are more active and like to meet with a variety of couples at a swingers club. It's important that you don't get a swingers club mixed up with a stripper club. Decide on how you would like to approach other lovers and see whether your partner would be comfortable with it or not.

Recently, there has been a rise in the number of websites that cater to swingers and people who want to wife swap for the first time. When you find a couple that you and your partner like, you can contact and ask to meet up at a semi-public place, like a hotel, a resort or cruise ship if you're feeling extravagant!

Establishing your daily dose of wife swapping!

After that discussion, you should talk about how much swapping you want to do. Would it be once a month, once a fortnight, or even once every two days? You never know with some people…

Nonetheless, you need to establish how many times is acceptable for you as a couple. Personally, I would get exhausted if I meet and fuck different couples every day, and it would be nice to be close to my partner our saucy shenanigans. But then again, everybody is different.

Some people can bed different couples every night and still can't quench their thirst, whereas others are more than happy to get pleasured by another duo once a month.

The sky is the limit, or is it…?

Another thing you have to be weary of is what you and your partner are comfortable with when it comes to letting another person touch your other half. If you want to enjoy a wife swap, then tell your partner what the boundaries are.

You and your partner could be completely lenient with each other and get into a 'full swap', which the term is self-explanatory. But for those who are still not sure, it's when you and your partner are allowed to go all the way with another couple. Oral, vaginal, anal double penetration and so on!

However, not everyone likes seeing their lover getting humped and ravaged by another guy, or getting fingered by another girl. That is why there is the option go having a 'soft swap', where you're restricted to do a limited amount of sex acts with another couple. Some duos wouldn't go any further than giving blowjobs or eating pussy, but others could go to some extremes like kissing and touching.

Making sure that everyone is happy

There's just one more hurdle now, I promise!

The last but certainly not least important topic that you need to talk about is fear. I've had to grasp the reality that not everyone is like me. Not everyone is sexually liberated or experimental as I am. Therefore, you have to make sure that you and your companion are on the same level.

It relates to what your limits are. Some swingers enjoy getting involved in anal and double penetration whereas others would rather stick to normal sex. Again, this is something that needs to be discussed so you won't experience any awkwardness after a swingers session. After all, sex is something that requires consent between two people. In this case, it would be for or more people.

Once you and your partner have clarified what you think is acceptable and what is not, you can be sure that you will enjoy the experience of mingling with other couples without any mishap or hassle. Remember, honesty is the best policy. Before you get involved in the lifestyle, you need to have an open and truthful conversation with your lover so you know that you both will enjoy the culture of swinging!